Just Another Rant...

[Janet]

During the week I make coffee, but my husband usually doesn't drink any. He gets up in enough time to get dressed and head to work. I...on the other hand drink a one cup before the route and sometimes one after. I sure can't drink two before the route before obvious reasons....:eek:

Anyway...on the weekends I make a large pot. I go to get my 2nd cup and it's all gone. That is the way my husband is and it infuriates me. He doesn't care who's it is or if anyone else wants any...he takes what he wants and too bad for anyone else.

My Mom is very selfish too and putting up with this double time is getting to me. I didn't say anything because I new it would be an argument and even though I'm pretty much done here...I still don't want to hurt his feelings. So I hold this stuff in until now. Just needed to vent.

[paula1961]

Sorry your hubby is a butt wipe Janet! He should have made more coffee!! I'm sorry but selfish people rub me the wrong way. He should be more considerate of your feelings. But apparantly he is just not natured that way. I probably wouldn't have said anything either, just cursed him in my mind!!
Sorry that you have to deal with this crap Janet!

[Janet]

I've dealt with this for so long....it's just getting so tiresome. Thanks Paula!

[judy]

It is too bad you have to live with someone who makes you angry! You deserve so much more, Janet!

[lynne b]

Oh Janet, I am sorry that you get so frustrated with him, i wish i could do something to help you out. You are dealing with so much right now. you know i am always here to listen to you.

[Blueyes]

Throw a glass of COLD water on him when he's in the shower. Tell him it's from a crazy woman named Betsi, and he'd BETTER treat my friend Janet with a heck of a lot more respect. This is his last warning:rainbowbridge:

[Janet]

Throw a glass of COLD water on him when he's in the shower. Tell him it's from a crazy woman named Betsi, and he'd BETTER treat my friend Janet with a heck of a lot more respect. This is his last warning:rainbowbridge:

Oh Betsi....this sure brought a smile to my face!!! You are so funny! I have plans for my future, it's just going to take some time yet. It's so frustrating to have to put up with a "butt wipe" as Paula called him.....LOL....good one!

[gja1000]

I'm so sorry you have to put up with him - I sure hope you can find yourself in a better place in the not too distant future. Life is too short to put up with such bu!!sh!t.

[Janet]

You know....I went back and read my first post....it does sound pretty petty, but when I have to put up with that every day...it's so frustrating. He is like that with everything. When I asked for help because I was tired of having to do everything from the cleaning, bill paying, phone calls...etc. he had the nerve to tell me that he does stuff too. Like when things need fixed. What I can't get him to understand is that I do my 'chores' every single day and he may only have to fix something once a month if that. I get to read how much you all love your husbands and how good they are to you and I get so envious. So....once in awhile I have to have a rant and rave session. I'm so glad you all understand.

[gja1000]

Holy Moly! Janet!! It's not petty - it's a continual symptom! Rant all you want.

AND, I do have the most wonderful husband on the board (sorry gals ;)), but let me tell you, I was married before Gary, for 8 years of hell! I was fortunate enough to be able to pick up my daughter, leave and file for divorce. It was a very terrible and unhappy situation. I simply could not have lived that way any longer. Plus there was drug use and after Brooke came along, I could no longer tolerate it.

So, I do completely understand how one incident which might seem petty, is enough to send you right over the edge. I really admire you for sticking around for so long, I know it is very very tough!

[Blueyes]

Janet, that's what we're here for! Living with a guy like that is no fun. Mike can be a really big jerk sometimes. It's like he has cycles of being kind and sweet, and then he is a selfish, argumentative butthead for a while. It makes me crazy, lol!

I'm glad you have a plan. Stick to it. For YOU!!

We love you, and when you need to blow off steam, just let 'er rip;)

[paula1961]

No Janet that certainly isn't a petty thing! You do not deserve to be treated with such disrespect. I hope things are better for you soon.

Like Gayle, I have a wonderful husband but was married to one of the biggest aholes on the face of this earth, the devil would be easier to get along with. There was physical and mental abuse along with the drugs too. Thankfully I was able to take my 3 little boys and get out, that was about 25 years ago. And I still didn't find Mr. Right until 10 yrs ago.

Better things are coming to you..I just know it! You are a wonderful and caring person Janet! I am praying that you can get this all worked out and you are able to do what is best for JANET:)

[Janet]

So now I have to go wash away the tears before the boys get home. You all make me feel so good and that my feelings have validation. Thank you for that. I love you!

[Blueyes]

I love YOU!!!

[paula1961]

I love you too Janet!:bighug:

[gja1000]

Janet, you are very loved and APPRECIATED on this board for your MANY wonderful qualities. It's too bad that someone right under your nose doesn't see and appreciate them!

[DianaB]

I'm sorry, Janet, that Rick is being........well,........a man!!! Sometimes they can be so insensitive. I have a solution.......I'll trade you one selfish MIL for your husband!!! Believe me....you'd soon want him back!!!! Vent away any time!!!!

[Janet]

Thanks ladies....what would I do without you???

[Shada]

Vent anytime Janet!!
I have been single and loving it for a few years now. You make me remember why!!
I love having control of my life. From what I eat, to what I watch on TV, and of course the time spent on computer.
I wish you luck in your future. Remember, it is YOUR future.
Do what makes you happy. Be strong!!!

[Gina]

Janet please wipe away those tears. No man is worth aggraviation. My husband is not a coffee drinker but I am . I have a solution for you.. Go invest in a Tassimo or Krups one cup coffee maker. My kids brought me one last Christmas and I love it.. The coffee disks are a little expensive but I buy at Bed and Bath with coupons. I love it!!

Janet you deserve so much better, if your not leaving shortly you need to make your life more enjoyable. I don't know if you have girlfriends nearby but you need to have a social life, get out do things that you enjoy.. Don't sit home and fret you can't make Rick change he needs to want to do that. But you can change you..Do things and show him that you don't need him to be a happier person.

We are always here for you so vent all you want.. Like the others said you deserve to be happy , your a wonderful woman and mother.. I love you to!!

[Janet]

Vent anytime Janet!!
I have been single and loving it for a few years now. You make me remember why!!
I love having control of my life. From what I eat, to what I watch on TV, and of course the time spent on computer.
I wish you luck in your future. Remember, it is YOUR future.
Do what makes you happy. Be strong!!!

Loved your post Shada...thank you. To me your life sounds really good.


Janet please wipe away those tears. No man is worth aggraviation. My husband is not a coffee drinker but I am . I have a solution for you.. Go invest in a Tassimo or Krups one cup coffee maker. My kids brought me one last Christmas and I love it.. The coffee disks are a little expensive but I buy at Bed and Bath with coupons. I love it!!

Janet you deserve so much better, if your not leaving shortly you need to make your life more enjoyable. I don't know if you have girlfriends nearby but you need to have a social life, get out do things that you enjoy.. Don't sit home and fret you can't make Rick change he needs to want to do that. But you can change you..Do things and show him that you don't need him to be a happier person.

We are always here for you so vent all you want.. Like the others said you deserve to be happy , your a wonderful woman and mother.. I love you to!!

Gina...it's really not just the coffee...it's what set me off...lol. This morning for another instance....the wind had been blowing all night, there are always drifts in front of the garage and in front of my bus. Drifts for the guys were busted through and a path made. I go out to start my bus and well...I have to dig myself out.

My thought....if I have to do everything myself anyway....what do I need him for? I have teeth to get fixed, better job to find and I will have my time...one way or another. I'm not one to give up ....

[Lindsey]

My thought....if I have to do everything myself anyway....what do I need him for? I have teeth to get fixed, better job to find and I will have my time...one way or another. I'm not one to give up ....

Good for you Janet! Live your life for yourself. It's terrible when two people are unhappy in a marriage, but if one can't care enough to even try there's not much more you can do. You deserve to be a happy person, and Ricky deserves to have a happy mother, and you are more than capable of doing everything you dream of doing. We all love you!

[pope1982]

Throw a glass of COLD water on him when he's in the shower. Tell him it's from a crazy woman named Betsi, and he'd BETTER treat my friend Janet with a heck of a lot more respect. This is his last warning:rainbowbridge:

Betsi, you are my new hero :)

Janet, I hope they have given you a little more of a break lately. You are one strong woman, sometimes we all get overwhelmed once we hit a certain point. It is healthy vent, no need to feel guilty. We are your friends and we love you!

[Gina]

Loved your post Shada...thank you. To me your life sounds really good.




Gina...it's really not just the coffee...it's what set me off...lol. This morning for another instance....the wind had been blowing all night, there are always drifts in front of the garage and in front of my bus. Drifts for the guys were busted through and a path made. I go out to start my bus and well...I have to dig myself out.

My thought....if I have to do everything myself anyway....what do I need him for? I have teeth to get fixed, better job to find and I will have my time...one way or another. I'm not one to give up ....



Janet I know that the coffee is not the problem just giving you a short term solution or just make the dam coffee and tell him not to touch it!! He is very inconsiderate and not acting like a man at all.. sorry to say this but come on making you shovel your own way that really stinks.

In reply to Shada its wonderful that she feels that way, but if I may add something to this equation YOU shoud be able to do all of that even if your married. I had problems awhile back and did marriage counceling.. THAT woke up my husband big time he realized I was not joking about leaving.. I became independent and now I DO WHAT I WANT... I am just trying to make suggestions so that you see that if your not leaving him you can't be miserable day after day . You deserve some happiness for life is short . Talk to him put it all out on the table if you haven't told him how you feel..

I am no expert , just trying to help you out...

[Janet]

You have helped Gina... more than you'll ever know. I pretty much do what I want, go where I want to go...etc. For the most part I'm a very happy person. I just have a lousy marriage.. :) I've thought about counceling, but I don't know if I want it to work. The feelings just aren't there. Maybe a trial separation would be a good idea...I don't know. I do know I can't support myself right now...not driving a bus. Right now though...I can handle it.

You ladies are the best and sure know how to make me smile. I love ya all!

[judy]

Having enough money is essential Janet. I have faith in your judgement. You will do whatever it takes to be happy! Knowing what a loving Mom you are, I'm sure Ricky's needs are a priority too.

[Janet]

Thanks Judy....you're right....Ricky is number 1.