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-   -   TO SPANK OR NOT TO SPANK! That is the question (http://www.4womentalk.com/forums/showthread.php?t=132)

Taurus Babe 09-19-2006 08:03 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Amber_lv
I spank but not beat and i don't abuse but damn sometimes they need a little swat to snap them out of the mode their in!

Although I don't agree with hitting or whatever you wanna call it, when Thor goes off the wall sometimes I'll do it but I feel really bad afterewards and realize the only purpose it served was getting my frustration out!

ldenise 09-19-2006 08:06 AM

I did spank. (my children are grown now) . I was spanked when I was a child and it didn't hurt me any. I have thought back to those times and wondered if I had not got that kind of punishment how would it have been. I would have been a brat!
I didn't have to spank my children very often because when I did spank them, it was hard enought that they didn't want it again. That was the purpose, they learned from it. You warn them and if they do wrong again then they get the punishment. They have turned out to be extremely good grown adults.
Children now a days know that they won't be any consequences when they do what they know is wrong. They will gladly take a "sitting down and talking to" approach just to do what they want to do. where is the rearing there? They have you wrapped around their fingers when they choose their punishment.

I have to jump back in here and add that I absolutely hate it when my grandchildren are spanked. (this I refuse to do because that is the parents job).

Sherry Lynn 09-19-2006 08:19 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by BabyNicole
I was wacked in the butt, but never beaten. It startled me, and I knew my mom and dad were mad at me. I don't have kids now, but I wouldn't think twice about tapping them in the a**. :rolleyes:

That's how my parents were. Usually all it took was her 'evil eye' , but when we did something really bad my Mom would take a fly swat and swat us on the backs of our legs. She never took it too far, and we always knew we were loved. And NEVER enough to leave marks much less bleed!

I remember seeing two sisters in gym class... when they went to change clothes they were black and blue all over. I mean big, nasty, deep bruises. Their parents were drunks and their dad had beat them for staying out after curfew. I was so upset I started crying, but they were numb to it... I guess it was nothing new to them. The last I heard they were both leading troubled lives. So sad. They didn't stand a chance.

Back then there was no such thing as an abuse hot line, or I would have called and reported the asshole. He was a prominent business owner in the town, so I guess if people knew they turned a blind eye on it.

Carolyn 09-19-2006 08:26 AM

I have no problem giving my kids a smack in the ass now and then but I find that taking things away from them or sending them to their room works better.

Courtney 09-19-2006 08:46 AM

My mother was beaten as a child. Her mother was strung out on vicaton(sp?) all the time and they never knew when they walked by her if she would grab them and go to town or not. So because of this she swore that she wouldn't ever hit my sister and I. My father never did either so we were never spanked. I believe we turned out fine. Acutally I think we were better behaved then most of our friends and respected our parents greatly. I don't necessarily think that its because we weren't spanked though. I think we behaved because there was constant discipline. We knew that if we did something wrong there would be consequences no questions asked. Another reason I think is that our parents showed a great respect to us and I think we were afraid to lose that or let them down.

I guess I should get to the point now...I don't think there's anything wrong with spanking and I don't have kids yet so I can't say for sure but I don't think spanking will fit into our family, when we start one. It worked just fine for me so I think I'd like to stick with that.

ginab 09-21-2006 10:00 AM

i do believe in it.if they need a spank i would spank them, but dont have children.
my me all the time, felt like everyday was another beating and i turned out just fine. if things back then were like today, i say to my mom she still would of been
in jail... she laughs...

magnolia 09-21-2006 10:22 AM

I have spanked my boys in the past, primarily with my hand - few times with the belt (NO belt buckle) and only 3 licks when either hand or belt was used. My parents spanked me as a child but it did not border on abuse - usually 3 licks for me and my brothers and sisters. My mother was the disciplinarian in the house as she was home 24/7 - she did not believe in telling us "wait til your father gets home" - by the time he got home, we had forgotten what we had done - if she punished us right when it happened, we remembered it. And she always told us after our punishment that she loved us and it hurt her to have to spank us - and she usually had tears in her eyes. I never told my boys to wait til their dad got home - I exacted punishment befitting the crime (time out, taking toys away, or spanking if it was really bad). Now that my boys are in their teens, I just can't bring myself to spank them - it is MUCH more effective to take tv, cell phone, playstation, etc away from them.

For those of you who were abused rather than spanked, God bless you each and everyone! From your posts here that I've read, you have turned out to be such wonderful people - at least your parents didn't take that away from you!

ginab 09-21-2006 10:26 AM

i would say abused, my mom would say spanked,, yeah right mom.. beat is more
like it... but you know what i deserved it, i always had to have the last word.
and still do...ha ha ha,, i laugh about it now, but everyday wow. i would answer her back to no end. what the heck was wrong with me... ?

Marilyn 09-21-2006 08:35 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by RLC12345678
Marilyn, I love how you can justify everything you do from the Bible. I really admire you for that. I feel the same exact way as you do about everything on this board so far, and it is because I believe in the Bible. I was spanked as a child per Proverbs 13:24. I am not a mother yet, but when I am, I will punish my children, but if other forms of punishment (i.e. time out, taking things away, ect.) do not work, then I will resort to spanking because bad behavior needs to be punished.

Thank you for your comments. I don't know that everything that I do can be justified by the Bible, I'm far from perfect. I do believe that the Bible is the inspired word of God, that we should not add to it, or take away from it, and it is our personal responsibilty to study and learn what God's will is for our lives. The direction that He gives us is because we are His children and He loves us and wants the best for us.

Miss_Sara 10-21-2006 02:14 AM

meh
I'm strange on this topic
it really depends on the kid
I would never ever judge a parent who did
but I spend a lot of time with children, like pretty much all of my days, either with day care kids or with my young 2-6 year old cousins
I could just never imagine spanking a kid
and that's after I took care of a 2 and 6 year old for a week and a half while their parents were on vacation

I think that if you discipline your child correctly from the beginning then there is not point

maybe a slap on the wrist, but not enough to make them cry out ofpain (faking it is different ha ha ha)

but for some kids they definitly deserve a spanking.

discipline is important, the bible says that it's your job.

Gutu28 10-21-2006 07:23 AM

I could never, would never spank my child. I just dont want my children to be subjected to it. I think there are plenty of other ways to punish instead of resorting to physical punishment. But..to each his own :D

Willow 10-21-2006 03:37 PM

We spank and we have a 3 swat limit per spanking rule. I think there have been a couple times when I issued a fourth swat because they jumped away during the spanking process.


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