[Marilyn]

Janet, I'm writing this to answer you question, and my intent is sincere and to speak as I believe is proper. The "marriages" in the Bible were what were recognized by the culture of the time as "marriages". To desolve the union required a divorce. There is a lot of scripture to back this up. They took unto them a wife. Whether or not there were legal documents or a ceremony, I'm not sure, but they were recognized by the society as being "married". In our society, the requirement to be considered "married" varies by our laws & can vary state to state, country to country, but most cultures know what a "marriage" is and when one is "married" and not just "living together".

An example of Christ knowing the difference can be found in John 4: 16-18. The Samaritan woman was apparently in a relationship with someone who was not her husband. ' Jesus said to her, "Go, call your husband, and come here." The woman answered and said, "I have no husband."
Jesus said to her, "You have well said, "I have no husband," for you have had five husbands, and the one whom you now have is not your husband; in that you spoke truly." '


Oprah and others know what marriage is. If you are in a committed long term relationship, and "marriage" is so important that you choose not to be married, what are you doing?

I have a friend who is in a long term relationship with a man she has chosen not to marry. She is "comfortable" with him, but admits that if someone better came along, she would end the relationship and move on. I ask her a few days ago what she is doing? Why is she with him if he's not Mr. Right? She stopped and said to me that I had a really good point, and she did not know, she would have to really thing about that. She attends church and considers herself a Christian, and yet, she has this in her life. She's a self supporting, very capable lady. The guy she's with is a loser, and if she would end the relationship, she could do so much better.

I know I'm a little off topic here, but what is a "committed" relationship with out marriage. I believe with all my heart that God wants us to be happy. He wants us to do what is right and if we do, we will have a better life. There will be trials in our life even if we do the best we can, but the trials are there to make us stronger if we keep our focus on Him.

Here are a few scriptures to consider. The Bible says it much better than I do. We don't have to try to explain things when God has already done so for us:

Hebrews 13:4 "Marriage is honorable among all, and the bed undefiled; but fornicators and adulterers God will judge."

The apostle Paul said in his letter to the church at Corinth in words inspired by God in 1 Corinthians 7:6-9, " But I say this as a concession, not as a commandment. For I wish that all men were even as I myself. But each one has his own gift from God, one in this manner and another in that.
But I say to the unmarried and to the widows: It is good for them if they remain even as I am; but if they cannot exercise self-control, let them marry. For it is better to marry than to burn with passion." He does not suggest that they find someone to have a committed relationship with. He says that they should marry.

Again, marriage must be important, or so many people would not be avoiding it and remaining in their "committed" relationships.

I'll probably be blasted for this post, but bring it on. The criticism we receive when we state the truth are some of the trials that we must expect. By the way, I do believe that our God is loving and forgiving, as any parent would be, but He expects us to follow His instructions to receive His blessings as any good parent would. None of us can be perfect, but we have to strive to study God's Word and do our best to do His will to be a recipient of his grace.