oh my oh my your situation is so much similar to mine that its kinda scary, but you what i have went through hell and back with my in laws and only on my husbands mothers side and you know i finally just went "crazy" in perspective from holding it in and i just let him know and i let her know and i said you know if you dont like it dotn coe around me or our children, and you know they dont neccessarily treat me much different but they do calm themselves when it comes to talking crap in my words. my husband also realized that im not trying to be a prude, im not trying to make her mad, im not trying to start trouble and he know realized hey you cannot talk to my wife that way and you cannot treat my kids thsi way.
my mother in law didnt want us to get married also and actually kicked my husband out of her house and gave him that day to move, and really there was no reason behind it also , she said she just got tired of seeing me there, and she got tired of him spending time with me and not them, which i understand but there were times when i was workig and he would call bored and say he was going to bed but they were gone or they were shopping or such and it was just a bunch of he said she said and now his mom said no i didnt kick you out your year was up and it was time for you to move, and you are a liar and you are not buying a house and etc, and shes just lying to you and she didnt signa contract and i mean crazy stuff, and he was just tired of it, he went with me and he signed the contract himself, etc etc she was just crazy, she didnt attend our small wedding and in fact we couldnt even get her to sign the witness on our marriage cert, so we had to go and actully find a cousin or someting to come to the wedding to sign it, crazy huh, heartbreaking huh,
she now doesnt attend our twins birthday this last january she doesnt come to my sons 7 year old birthday becuse hes not her real grandson, when she came to their 1st birthday she came with 2 big bags of clothes for each kid and she then had enough nerve to say well when we shop we do it rigt and we buy tehbest stuff, we dont go to walmart and target,
she hurt alot of people that day, and you know they way they act and its funny becuase at the end of the day they have no friends, they have no happiness and it goes deep down
you cannot keep your husband away but you have to at least be on track with your husband as to what you expect from her, and what he should expect from her towards you guys.
and let me tell you, just becuse she meets you and acts nice, she may still continue her behavior, you have to know that you have tried and you are continuing to try with her, and that you come out as the better person, and you may spend all your life trying to get her to like you and it may seem that it is never going to happen but you have the feeling of knowign you have done your best with her, i have been through it and i actually feel sorry for my mil, she really has some screws loose but you know i cannot judge her and i told her if you talk aboutme behind my back just dont let me hear about it, because if you do not have enough respect for someone to just let them be and love them how they are then thats your problem,
you cannot keep your husband away becuase in reality he will only have one mom
and next time ask to go with him to see his little brother, but want to go, take her some pie but want to, take her flowers, but want to you have to really want to
i mean shes either going to accept it or throw you out on the porch and if she does than your husband should step in and explain if you cannot treat her nicely then we will not come back, its not just me mom its us now,
i mean you have to want to before i was new at it and i wanted to hate her and fight and argue with her because she called me an oakey (sp?) or becuase i was dirty becusae i removed my shoes at the door and i propped my feet underneath me on the couch,
i mean i had seen her do the same thing but you know they just dont get it, and finally i did and i finally just realized hey i love my hubs and she sitn going to cause fights between us, and now things are not perfect and things are not peachy with her but it takes time and understanding and you need to come out of this being the adult and being the better person
i do think age has something to do with it in some cases, but you know what i am
21 years old i have been married for 3 years
i have a seven year old son and 2 year old twins, i have lost a child at the age of 3 weeks with my husband and i held him till he took his last breath,
i own a home and i have 3 vehicles, and numerous toys. but you know what its learning yourself anf learning life, and you never stop learning, you have to work hard at everythign you do including relationships, you just have to tell yourself you can do it and be your biggest fan becuase if you are not noone is going to do it for you
i am soooo sorry this is so long but if you even need advice just om me and im not on here often but you can also email me at
sgutierrez@bakercorp.com
i am not a pycologist in fact i cant even spell it
but i have been there and i can help you out if needed, just take some time and do not let this person get to you, i mean who is she to ruin your day now come on lift your head and lets get this day started with a smile