I was always pretty bashful about this myself. (I was raised Catholic with all the guilt that comes along with it). It took my husband to coach me in this and he actually encourages me to do this for myself (of course he gets to peek
). Because of him, I bought a "toy". He is really open to all sorts of experiences and has taught me alot. I think it is important that you learn what feels good to you so that you can convey this to your partner.