[magnolia]

Please don't feel that way - you handled the situation the best way you could at the time. There isn't a situation we've all been in at one time or another that we haven't looked back over it hours, days, weeks, or months later and commented that we could have handled it better so don't worry yourself over that.

As for the friendship, I think you already know the answer. It's hard to let go of a close friendship but part of having (and maintaining) a friendship is like a marriage - give and take on both parts. Seems from what I read, you've been giving, she's been taking and never returned in kind. I had a very, very close friend of mine that I "lost" several years ago. She was my best friend, I was matron of honor at her wedding, and her "rock" when she divorced years later. She always told me she didn't know how she would have gotten through with a 2 year old if not for me. Once she started "living" again after the divorce, I introduced her to friends of mine, hoping that she would make more friends. Well, no sooner than I introduced her to a girl I worked with and who I was friends with, she became friends with her and I was glad - we did things as a threesome! It got to a point where she stopped calling me and inviting me places with her. I'd call her and ask what she was doing and she would reply she and Julie were going shopping, or going to lunch, or going over to Julie's, etc. Her and her boyfriend began to have cook-outs with Julie and her husband (something we had all done as couples together) and not inviting hubby and I. Of course, that is no way to treat a friend - only there when you need them type of thing. I also realized that she could not be friends with more than one person at a time. We talked about it and I told her how I felt - shut out from her life, cast aside like yesterday's news. I even told her if not for me introducing them, she wouldn't even know Julie and I was glad that they were friends and admitted I was jealous of her "dumping" me for Julie's friendship. I told her I felt like she had just used me our entire friendship to benefit herself. She didn't really defend herself and was, or so it seemed, genuinely upset, that I was upset. But we drifted apart - a great friendship gone. Do I have regrets? Some - but I realized things happen for a reason that we can't always explain or understand. This seems to be a time in your life where you don't understand and can't explain the reasons. Follow your heart! If your heart tells you to call her, then do so - talk it out. You will feel better regardless of how things turn out and you will get your true answer based on her actions/reactions to your call.

Best of luck to you! You're in my thoughts and prayers.