To be a New Yorker....

[judy]

Only those who grew up in New York will understand this:

THERE IS NO NORTH AND SOUTH.

IT'S 'UPTOWN' OR 'DOWNTOWN'.

AND EAST OR WEST IS 'CROSS-TOWN'.

YOU RIDE IN A SUBWAY CAR WITH NO AIR CONDITIONING JUST BECAUSE THERE ARE SEATS AVAILABLE.

YOU TAKE THE TRAIN HOME AND YOU KNOW EXACTLY WHERE ON THE PLATFORM THE DOORS WILL OPEN THAT WILL LEAVE YOU RIGHT IN FRONT OF THE EXIT STAIRWAY.

YOU KNOW WHAT A 'REGULAR' COFFEE IS..

IT'S NOT MANHATTAN ... IT'S "THE CITY "

YOU CROSS THE STREET ANYWHERE BUT ON THE CORNERS AND YOU YELL AT CARS FOR NOT RESPECTING YOUR RIGHT TO DO IT.

YOU MOVE 3,000 MILES AWAY, SPEND 10 YEARS LEARNING THE LOCAL LANGUAGE AND PEOPLE STILL KNOW YOU'RE FROM BROOKLYN, LONG ISLAND OR THE BRONX THE MINUTE YOU OPEN YOUR MOUTH.

YOU RETURN AFTER 10 YEARS AND THE FIRST FOODS YOU WANT ARE A 'REAL' PIZZA , A 'REAL' BAGEL, AND 'REAL' CHINESE FOOD.

YOU ARE NOT UNDER THE MISTAKEN IMPRESSION THAT ANY HUMAN BEING WOULD BE ABLE TO ACTUALLY UNDERSTAND A PUBLIC ADDRESS ANNOUNCEMENT ON THE SUBWAY.

YOU'RE NOT THE LEAST BIT INTERESTED IN GOING TO TIMES SQUARE ON NEW YEAR'S EVE.

YOUR INTERNAL CLOCK IS PERMANENTLY SET TO KNOW WHEN ALTERNATE SIDE OF THE STREET PARKING REGULATIONS ARE IN EFFECT.

YOU KNOW WHAT A BODEGA IS.

SOMEONE BUMPS INTO YOU AND YOU CHECK FOR YOUR WALLET.

YOU DON'T EVEN NOTICE THE LADY WALKING DOWN THE STREET HAVING A PERFECTLY NORMAL CONVERSATION WITH HERSELF.

YOU CRINGE AT HEARING PEOPLE PRONOUNCE 'HOUSTON' STREET LIKE THE CITY IN TEXAS..

THE PRESIDENTIAL VISIT IS A MAJOR TRAFFIC JAM, NOT AN HONOR.

YOU CAN NAP ON THE SUBWAY AND NEVER MISS YOUR STOP.

THAT'S NEW YORK, BABY! YA GOTTA LOVE IT.