Plans For Easter?

[judy]

That's too bad about your hubby's family Diana!

Life is strange....sometimes families don't speak for years, and then just make up. You just never know!

[DIANE W]

It is an awful situation, but there comes a time that you just have to say enough..... you have to think about yourself and how that relationship affects you, and we decided it is just not worth all the heartache anymore.

I think its a shame, life is too short for falling out, but sometimes its not fair for you to keep on putting up with things.

I am not ruling out a making up, for the future, i would always forgive them, but hubby, i am not too sure, he is much more hurt than me as its his parents.

[Janet]

I really hope that things can be worked out. It's so crazy but this morning I had a good cry because I miss my brothers. Of course I could call them, but I know they don't want to hear from me, otherwise they'd call. It's okay I guess, as long as they are good and happy.

Maybe once Mom's estate is totally settled and some more time passes, they open their hearts a little more. Without knowing what happened between your husband and his parents, I hope enough time will pass that they can reconcile. We need family.

[DianaB]

Jessie, it is nice to hear about your boys. You don't mention them much.

Diane, I'm so sorry to hear about your husband's family. It is hard, I'm sure, especially around the holidays. It's hard to resolve when there is hurt feelings. Hugs to your family.

I mentioned on another thread what we ended up doing. Cleaning on Friday....Picnic with Glen's family on Saturday.......The kids, grandkids, Mom, and step-dad here on Sunday. My brother and his daughter with her two kids didn't come and greatly disappointed my Mom. I felt so sorry for her.

[DIANE W]

Originally Posted by Janet

I really hope that things can be worked out. It's so crazy but this morning I had a good cry because I miss my brothers. Of course I could call them, but I know they don't want to hear from me, otherwise they'd call. It's okay I guess, as long as they are good and happy.

Maybe once Mom's estate is totally settled and some more time passes, they open their hearts a little more. Without knowing what happened between your husband and his parents, I hope enough time will pass that they can reconcile. We need family.

Do you know Janet, it wasnt that there was a terrible thing happen, its just a drip drip drip of petty rows over the years, we have always been there for them, done whatever they have asked of us at the drop of a hat, been at their beck and call really. But the last fall out just sort of made my husband realise that unless we back away, we are always going to be going through this cr-p with them.
So for our own sakes and peace we have made this difficult decision, who know if they come around and accept what they are like with him..... then who knows in the future? but as i have already said, we have to take care of ourselves now, we cant keep going through all the arguments anymore, each one seems to get bigger, because they bring up the last one as well.
I feel for my husband so much, because they have proved they dont care about their son and his feelings.............and that is just not right, i would never let anything come between my daughter.
So although we are sad it came to this, at least we have peace now.

[Janet]

I sure know about the drip...drip...drip part. After awhile it just gets to you, I know. Sometimes space is best. I'm pretty sure I'll neverbe close to my brothers again, I won't let them have a chance to hurt me anymore, but it would still be nice to speak with them once in awhile....without their wives or family.

We all have to do what is best for our own family and well being.

[judy]

This is why I no longer speak to my stepmother and her children. The drip drip drip...it is very toxic!

I do want to go see my stepmother though. She is 95 or 96, and I try to never have regrets in my life. We did have our good times, and she was very good to my Dad.

[DIANE W]

You are so right, the only trouble is i worry now that, what happens if something happens to them, what would we do about funeral etc. I am also stressing about are we doing the right thing - i know we are deep down its just me.

See this is me all over, still worrying and we have cut all ties, so as not to be stressed

Janet, It is so sad, and i would love to not be going through all this, and if they treated my husband like they do his sister (its as if they are careful what they say to her, as they dont want to offend her - yet they feel they can say whatever to us, and we have to take it), all he wants is to be treated the same, not preferential treatment.

Maybe when all the business with Mum's affairs are sorted out, then you will get a better relationship with your brothers again - fingers crossed for you.

Judy, I know what you mean about your stepmother, who knows maybe you will get chance to visit her, or take her out for lunch maybe, without her daughters present.

Diana, even though you are going through a tough time at the moment, it will get better. I think it must be lovely for you having a big, close knit family..... that must be really really nice.