Eat Disorders

[Gina]

Originally Posted by Miss_Sara

I suffered from an eating disorder for a LONG time
It started in like elementary school which is pretty sad
to be honest it's something I don't think I'll be able to completely lose
it's like a part of me
everytime I think "I'm hungry" there's always that thought "well you better not eat"
when I was 13 I weighed like 78 lbs. which wasn't healthy at all
even though I'm really small and tiny (mainly from poor nutrition when I was a baby) I was still ridiculously under weight
the whole family must've realised
but when I entered highschool I had a seriously supportive group around me (show choir) and I gained like 10 lbs and was healthy, and my family would tell me how I had gained weight and how I should be careful (my response was, finally snapping and telling them to back off)

I feel so bad for girls suffering from this, because it is a hard habit to break if you have it for years. I just hope this doesn't become a "life style" choice
because that's a load of crap
it is a disease, and you can get SO sick from it!!!
I know I've talked a few girls out of it, so if any of your kids have the problem, I'm young (18) so you should just give me a way to contact them so I can help them!!
Don't ignore this if your child has it!

Sara.. What are the signs to look for? My daughter is 19 yrs old and has been away at college for two years now. She is tall and was pursing modeling at one time and whenever we went out to the city the modeling agencies would tell her she is pretty but she needs to lose at least 10 pds. Now mind you my daughter was never heavy. So I discouraged her from that career. Over the years while she was in high school I think she had a problem, she never ate with us at night always running out, her friends swore up and down that she ate. Today she eats but she does eat lots of salads and healthy foods. She does a lot of excersizing. But to be honest she gets mad at me when I always ask her if she ate. Always has. She does get her menstrual cycle on time and her teeth are pretty , they say that is the first tell tale. I get worried but I don't know how I can reach her, she says she eats and I can't be a policeman 24/7..

[Miss_Sara]

bad teeth, hair falling out, and missing periods are not really the first signs, except maybe missing periods. the rest can take a while. and you wouldn't really notice anyways if she was having a little thinner hair and such. Even if you really tried to remember.
I don't want to jump to conclusions but to be honest it sounds like she might be anorexic, especially since she never eats dinner with you and always leaves. If her friends say she eats, that might mean that they might be anorexic and support her, or that she is lying to them and complaining about how people say she doesn't eat (to throw them off, and complaining about how you bug her of course, normal),or she got pissed off when they said something to her and told them that she'll eat if they don't tell you.
the salads and exercising if you're already thin is pretty much obvious. This is what I would do when I stayed at my friends house for a summer, my friends would be like "you never eat!" (and this would sometimes cause my blood sugar to get so low that I'd be shaking and near fainting) and when they got really annoying I'd eat something that is a CATABOLIC food. These are foods where you burn more calories then you eat, and some of them aren't very obvious. like tuna. I'd eat some tuna and then I'd go swimming for an hour to make sure I burned every single calorie. After a while I got used to having to eat in front of them so I was on this serious catabolic food diet and lost a LOT of weight that way, so anyone who actually wants to lose weight, research that, it's great, and has some yummy foods.
OF COURSE she gets mad if you ask if she ate, idk if your daughter still is now, but I think she definitly was in highschool. Also not eating tends to make you angry, idk, I guess because you are already stressed, and not eating makes you EXHAUSTED, but then you keep exercising so you don' talways look as tired as you are. Imagine how angry you'd be if you were trying to keep a secret and your mom kept butting in? Even if it IS for her own good!

I hope that your daughter isn't anorexic, I really do. But when obesity growing, so is anorexia, definitly. Girls are TERRIFIED of being fat, I mean scared to tears. I've seen girls cry, not because they've gained weight, but because they were afraid of looking like their mothers, or aunts, or whomever.

does your daughter have a myspace? if so I can just randomly contact her and chat her up, and of course I wont say anything about you. I would never do that, but I can just ask her if she's anorexic, and she'll probablly tell the truth to an online stranger that she thinks she can confide in. This is "an invasion of privacy" or whatever, but idk, I think it's different when it comes to health.

love you and support to you, there's definitly a possiblity your daughter isn't anorexic at all!!! Don't read TOO into things.

(and because she's 19 she can choose not to get help)

[Miss_Sara]

I think I'll post a little things about some of the first signs that your daughter (or son!) might be anorexic.
-loss of hair, check the drain and when you take out the trash to see if there is an abundance.
-lighter, shorter, or non existent menstrual cycle
-excuses at dinner (too much homework, just ate, not hungry, sick, etc.)
-more illness. when you don't eat you get sick a lot more
-much more irritable and touchy
-TIRED
-exercising often
-spending more time alone in their room (or on the internet, do you know the internet is like the gateway to tips on how to be anorexic, it's disgusting to see some of these "pro-ana" sites)
-spending more time simply out.

but some of these can simply be PMS as well!

I think the best way to prevent this from happening, or stop it when it's early, is to simply let your daughter eat healthier, say "hey, we should start eating healthier together" (you'll probablly have to cook a different meal for your husband lol). Eating healthy isn't anorexia. So if you pick out some healthy low cal foods you want to try, and tell your daughter that you think you should both try a new diet, she may accept it and see that if she eats healthy she wont gain weight!

[RLC12345678]

Originally Posted by Miss_Sara

I think I'll post a little things about some of the first signs that your daughter (or son!) might be anorexic.
-loss of hair, check the drain and when you take out the trash to see if there is an abundance.
-lighter, shorter, or non existent menstrual cycle
-excuses at dinner (too much homework, just ate, not hungry, sick, etc.)
-more illness. when you don't eat you get sick a lot more
-much more irritable and touchy
-TIRED
-exercising often
-spending more time alone in their room (or on the internet, do you know the internet is like the gateway to tips on how to be anorexic, it's disgusting to see some of these "pro-ana" sites)
-spending more time simply out.

but some of these can simply be PMS as well!

I think the best way to prevent this from happening, or stop it when it's early, is to simply let your daughter eat healthier, say "hey, we should start eating healthier together" (you'll probablly have to cook a different meal for your husband lol). Eating healthy isn't anorexia. So if you pick out some healthy low cal foods you want to try, and tell your daughter that you think you should both try a new diet, she may accept it and see that if she eats healthy she wont gain weight!

This is AWESOME advice, Sara!!!!!! My neighbor growing up was bulemic and her mom found out and they started attending Weight Watchers classes together. When my friend saw that she could eat healthy and not gain weight (like you said) then she quit being bulemic.

[DianaB]

Thanks Sara for posting the signs to watch for and your great advice.

[Willow]

My cousin was anorexic for a long time. Then she married this control freak, which turned out to be a blessing! He MADE her eat. This doesn't work for everyone, but it did for her. Unfortunately, she did lose all her teeth from malnourishment. But she has gained some weight and is looking healthier all the time. She recently had baby number six and has been battling some other health issues not related to her eating disorder. She had a c-section and now has a staph in fection in her incision and her dr will not treat it. It is almost to the point of her dying.

[RLC12345678]

Originally Posted by Willow

My cousin was anorexic for a long time. Then she married this control freak, which turned out to be a blessing! He MADE her eat. This doesn't work for everyone, but it did for her. Unfortunately, she did lose all her teeth from malnourishment. But she has gained some weight and is looking healthier all the time. She recently had baby number six and has been battling some other health issues not related to her eating disorder. She had a c-section and now has a staph in fection in her incision and her dr will not treat it. It is almost to the point of her dying.

OMG! This is so aweful!!!!!!!!! I sure do hope she gets better soon! I am sure she is sick after her c-section bc her immune system is compromised from malnourishment. ((((((hugs!))))) to you, her and her family.