Oh My Mother!!!

[Janet]

Originally Posted by catlover

All I can say is...wow. When do you know when is the right time to have a parent's license taken away? My mom is only 75, but she's always been a "nervous" driver-things have NOT improved with age. On one hand, I dread when she can no longer drive. Not only because it will take away a lot of her independence, but also because it will make it harder on me! I'll be the one getting her groceries, picking up her prescriptions, taking her to the doctor, etc.

But on the other hand-when does it become a safety issue? I sure don't want to see my mom get hurt in an accident (which would probably be her fault!) and I also don't want to see anyone else get hurt. It's so hard to know what is the right thing to do.

I really don't think my Mom should be driving much longer, but it will be an awful day when we tell her she can't drive anymore. I figured I would just go to the license branch and talk with them about failing her. That way she won't be hurt and upset at one of us kids. She can only hear out of one ear and then not real well and her sight isn't good either..she had a stroke in one eye so it's a little blurry. She wears two sets of sunglasses because the sun bothers her so much.

You're right though, their independence will be taken. It will fall mostly on me to go with her to get groceries, pay bills, Drs. well...just anywhere she will need to go. I live in the country and she lives in town, so it will be some traveling for me for sure. My one brother and his wife will help out, they live in town, but they both work during the day.

We'll just have to wait and see what happens. She won't give up anything without a fight and she hates being told what to do...

[DianaB]

Janet, I'm so sorry to hear that you're Mom is having trouble driving. It really is hard to get an older person to stop because, just like you said, it's taking away their independence. Your community probably has programs to help with appointments and such. I know that our Senior Citizen's program has a van that will take older people to their appointments and to the grocery store. You just have to schedule your appointments with them. It could help take some of the pressure off of you to always be the one to drive her around.

Also, I'm sure that your spunky Mother drove herself to church this morning!!!!! And you'll be JUST like her, Janet!!!!!

[Marilyn]

Janet, I was just thinking and Diana said it too, the apple doesn't fall far from the tree. I'd say you are just as spunky as her.

Do you think it counts if you break the law to get to church???? Just a thought.....

BTW, at least here in Texas, you can't have their license taken away. And the department of public safety will not work with you at all on this issue. My father got to the point that he should not have been driving. They renewed his drivers license in the mail. Due to his clean record, he did not need to go to the office to have it done, just mailed in the money and he was good to go. He passed away at 82 before he had an accident and hurt anyone.

Hope your mum gets things straightened out and stays safe!!!

[Janet]

Originally Posted by DianaB

Janet, I'm so sorry to hear that you're Mom is having trouble driving. It really is hard to get an older person to stop because, just like you said, it's taking away their independence. Your community probably has programs to help with appointments and such. I know that our Senior Citizen's program has a van that will take older people to their appointments and to the grocery store. You just have to schedule your appointments with them. It could help take some of the pressure off of you to always be the one to drive her around.

Also, I'm sure that your spunky Mother drove herself to church this morning!!!!! And you'll be JUST like her, Janet!!!!!

Yes we have a wonderful senior citizens group here. They do all kinds of things...to tell you the truth, as soon as I turn 55 I'm heading up there. I've suggested it a hundred times to Mom to go there. You can dance, play cards, bowl just about anything you want...take trips....but you know what she tells me????? All the people at the senior citizens center are too old....LOLOLOL