My girl

[gja1000]

Judy (big sigh), I would be saying the exact same things as you are, but inside I'd be thinking - OMG! What is wrong with you people!!!

I always take the safest route - I'm not much of a risk-taker. So, I only had one child because I was worried that I couldn't afford two, and I had/have a great career. I can't imagine having MS and thinking about having another child, especially when I have 3 already and ESPECIALLY when my husband does not have a job. That just blows my mind, really it does, I can't imagine having only one income, and thinking in any way shape or form about having another baby, especially in light of having MS. I would be thinking what if something happens to me and I can't work, ever again, what will happen to my family. I would be terrified of that. But like I said, I'm not much of a risk-taker.

Judy, I wish you and them the best - I guess that's all you can do.

[Gina]

Judy I believe you are doing the right thing by not voicing your opionions .. That is a tough one though.. I am not a meddlesome person but this would be hard to do being your daughter has three healthy children and is doing great with her health.. Why rock the boat... but mum is the word . Your SIL should not expect you to be at their beck in call , you have your own life to live and deserve to find some happiness. I wish them the best in whatever they decide..

[Marilyn]

Judy, I think you are doing a great job. It's hard to keep mum, but given the circumstances, it's the best option. I wouldn't worry about a hypothetical commitment and his expectation that you be there 100%. What happens happens, and it will all workout if or when it does. One day at a time.....

[judy]

She went to the doctor today who has a wait and see attitude. She may still be pregnant. He is going to do a sonogram on Friday. She does plan to keep trying, so I will have to slowly prepare myself for this.

Jess and I didn't talk for 3 years, and I learned that being supportive is the way it has to be for our relationship. I do agree with you though, Gayle. I would like to say OMG! What is wrong with you people!!! I am convinced that they both are crazy. It seems to work for them though, so who knows?

I also agree with you, Marilyn. Whatever will happen will happen, and it will all work out for the best.

[gja1000]

I know about your rift, and I know that keeping quiet and being supportive is the only way now. That's exactly what I'd be doing, but still.......that's not what I'd be thinking inside.

Also, I know I would have handled your sil 100% statement, just like you did. But inside I would have been thinking that there's no way in HE!! that I'd be able to be 100% supportive. Again, I'd just have to take that one day by day.

You'll do fine - you always do. You have such a good attitude about all of this. You can't change a thing that they may do, so just try to be as supportive as you can and go with the flow - which you are already doing.

I like Diane's signature line, I can't remember exactly, but it's something like, live for today and tomorrow will take care of itself. BUT, I'm a supreme planner and so I would still be thinking OMG! What are you people thinking!!!

[judy]

Yeah....it's not easy to keep my mouth shut! I do fine with my daughter, but with my SIL, not so much!


Well, no matter what I say to him, there is no way I'll be available 100% of the time! My grandmother used to tell my aunt that the best way to be happy is to"wiggle through each day." I used to get annoyed at this, thinking that I should be able to just be myself and everything will fall into place around me. I have learned that it just doesn't work that way with everyone.

Wouldn't it be nicer though?

[Marilyn]

Judy, I like what you grandmother said. Actually, with all the plans we try to follow, in actuality, most days we just wiggle through. There is actually comfort in realizing this. Wish you the best in this situation. I do wonder though, what are they thinking???