So sad right now......

[DIANE W]

Thank you for saying that Diana - it means a lot.

[Janet]

I know as each day passes...it will become a little easier for you and your uncle. It will never be the same, but when you hold memories close...it will be more than bearable. Just take your time...everyone grieves in different ways and in the time it takes to start moving again.

I have always felt the hard part was after everyone goes back to their normal lives...you and your uncle will still be grieving. Don't be afraid to talk about your aunt, others may want to, but will be afraid it may upset you, it will help you and them to talk.

Like the others have said....I'm so glad you're a part of the wonderful women here. Whenever you need us...just let us know.

[DIANE W]

Thank you Janet, you are so kind.

I agree it will get a little easier, we do talk about her quite a lot, and i am not afraid to tell my uncle a funny story of one of our conversations or outings - and we do end up laughing.

I think you are right other people tend to not talk too much for fear of upsetting us, my Uncle said today he feels totally lost and said he still feels her presence in the home.

I explained it must be so much harder for him, because i can go home and it may sound silly but i sometimes can think she is still at home - only for a little while, then it comes back to me that she isnt.

But we do think about her all the time, and we have talked about her passing and agreed that if you have to go then the way she went was the best way - it was so peaceful and calm.

Thank you again everyone for your good wishes and thoughtful posts.

[gja1000]

Originally Posted by DIANE W

my Uncle said today he feels totally lost and said he still feels her presence in the home.

I have no doubt that she is close and watching over him. Maybe she will be able to come to him in a dream at some point and tell him she is OK and he's going to be OK too. That often happens.

Maybe when he is feeling so lost and feeling her presence, he could sit quietly and think about his fondest memories or think about what she might be wanting him to do when he is feeling so lost. That might help bring him some peace. Those feelings are so normal, but they feel so abnormal.

[DIANE W]

Gayle you are so right in what you say, i totally agree.


Well today has been a very eventful day..... I had a phonecall this morning informing me that my Uncle had had a FALL

The carer had gone in at 8.10 and found him on the floor in the bedroom, luckily he had only been there about 10 minutes.

So he is now in hospital with a fractured pelvis, he is in a lot of pain, and on pain relief. They have told me he is likely to be in for some time as he will need to get his mobility back - I am relieved about this, because i dont think he could cope at home alone at the moment.

But oh my it just seems to be one thing after the other happening to me.....

It is also his 83rd Birthday tomorrow - I can think of better places to spend a birthday.

I should know more tomorrow, I think they are going to be sending him to a rehabilitation place, to get him more mobile, once they have his pain under control.

I am going to have some food and a glass or bottle of wine, and try to relax, after another stressful 8 hour hospital visit - didnt think i would be back there so soon after my Aunty.

[DianaB]

Oh my......that's too bad about your Uncle. Thank goodness he didn't lay on the floor for very long. At least he'll be in a good place and be taken well care of for awhile......hopefully long enough that you get a good rest before taking over again. Hugs!!

[judy]

Oh my! Poor man! Relax a bit while he is in the hospital so that you have energy for yourself. If you get used up, you won't be any help for him anyway.

I am so very sorry all this is happening to your family.