Serious Question About Nursing Homes

[Janet]

See....I told you I learn so much from you. I'm so glad the one not in a nursing home won't lose everything. That was so scary to think about. I'm sure my friend will be happy to find out too. She has always been one to worry about things, whether real or not.

Thanks for the link, I'll be checking it out and hopefully I will be able to understand it...lol.

[judy]

Thanks Gayle! This is a good website!

I have to call my financial manager (not that are a lot of finances to manage!). I do have an annuity, a house, a pension and SS. I have gotten a will form from the teachers' union. I have to sit down with Jessie and Steve about some details, and I have to find out what to do with my $ and my house. I believe in NYS, everything has to be in somebody else's name five years before you end up in a NH. I'm not about to put things in Jessie and Steve's names now, but, at some point, I might.

If I don't, the proceeds from the house and the $ I have go to the NH until it is used up. Then, Medicare or Medicaid pays for it. I have no desire for the state to get my house. I would like Jessie to get whatever she can for it. I don't have enough money to worry about.

It is a dilemma! I want full control over my property, but don't want her to lose it if I end up in a home before I transfer it.

[gja1000]

It is a dilemma, Judy. Fortunately for me, my daughter's husband makes a very good income (now) so I'm not going to worry about giving them my house. If I have to go into the NH, I will have them sell my house and use the money to pay for NH care till it runs out, hopefully, it won't run out. I will be single when that happens so I won't have to worry about my spouse.

[judy]

I don't have to worry about Jessie getting my house. Steve doesn't make any money, but they won't be set for life because of my house! I would just hate for the NH to get it instead of her.

It is sad to have to say that you will be single. It is just so unpredictable as to how life works out, after all of our planning!

[Janet]

You're right Judy. This thread has turned kind of sad. I was so upset with my friend for bringing it up in the first place. Then of course I worry about it. I want to make sure Ricky gets everything. Guess I need to start planning. We wanted to get Mom's taken care of first and it should be finished by the end of April or first of May. Then we will be getting our Wills made.

[gja1000]

Judy, it is sad to say that I know I will be single at the end of my life - but it is reality. I live with this everyday, and I think about it often. I think (I hope) it will help me deal with it when he is gone. The truth is that 50% of the people with the diagnosis of heart failure die within 5 years and 25% more within 7 years. Gary has been diagnosed for 8 1/2 years, so he is living on borrowed time - because - he has so many other health problems, all of which, complicate heart failure. There is no doubt he would already be gone if he were not married to a health professional. Now, that is the rational side of me - I know when it actually happens I will be a basket case - but it will not be a surprise.

I'm sorry this thread has turned sad, but I never say these things to anyone. It helps to be able to say them here. it does cause a lump in my throat, but I need to get it out sometimes.

[Janet]

You go right ahead Gayle, well always be here for you. I wish I could give you a hug, you means so much to me.