Serious Question About Nursing Homes

[judy]

I don't have to worry about Jessie getting my house. Steve doesn't make any money, but they won't be set for life because of my house! I would just hate for the NH to get it instead of her.

It is sad to have to say that you will be single. It is just so unpredictable as to how life works out, after all of our planning!

[Janet]

You're right Judy. This thread has turned kind of sad. I was so upset with my friend for bringing it up in the first place. Then of course I worry about it. I want to make sure Ricky gets everything. Guess I need to start planning. We wanted to get Mom's taken care of first and it should be finished by the end of April or first of May. Then we will be getting our Wills made.

[gja1000]

Judy, it is sad to say that I know I will be single at the end of my life - but it is reality. I live with this everyday, and I think about it often. I think (I hope) it will help me deal with it when he is gone. The truth is that 50% of the people with the diagnosis of heart failure die within 5 years and 25% more within 7 years. Gary has been diagnosed for 8 1/2 years, so he is living on borrowed time - because - he has so many other health problems, all of which, complicate heart failure. There is no doubt he would already be gone if he were not married to a health professional. Now, that is the rational side of me - I know when it actually happens I will be a basket case - but it will not be a surprise.

I'm sorry this thread has turned sad, but I never say these things to anyone. It helps to be able to say them here. it does cause a lump in my throat, but I need to get it out sometimes.

[Janet]

You go right ahead Gayle, well always be here for you. I wish I could give you a hug, you means so much to me.

[judy]

I think you are right to keep the reality somewhere in your mind, but we are here for you whenever you want to bring it up. I do the same with Jessie, and I did it with my mother, who also had heaert failure.

One breath at a time.

[DianaB]

We all realize that Gary's health is fragile and that you do a wonderful job of making sure he's in the best health that he can be in. I know that I couldn't do as good of a job as you do because I don't understand the medical field. It shows how much you love Gary. Should anything happen to Gary you can rest assured that you have definitely given him the best quality of life that is within your reach. You are a good wife!!

[Blueyes]

We are in the same boat Gayle. Our plans have to be made a little differently than most people. There is a rule her about Spousal Impoverishment. When my mom had a stroke and had to go to a nursing home, my dad got to keep their house and his retirement. Her SS went to the nursing home. They only had one car, but he did have to make me beneficiary of his life insurance.