Living Together Before Marriage?

[Mandy]

I have done it, and for us it worked out great! When we got married we got the "butterfly's" again, that was 16 years ago, almost 3 years ago we renewd our vows, and did it all over again, fell in love, were on cloud 9, had a huge wedding Keeps life interesting LOL

[Chandra Amaya]

I think it is always different for different situations & different people. With my first hubby we didn't. We were very young & I wish I had known alittle more about him before I had married him. Living together might have helped. He was a drug addict. My second hubby & I did. We lived together for a month before getting married. I think it was exactly what I needed to show me all men are not the same.

[Marilyn]

My opinion on this question does not matter. God gave us his Word as our guide and His opinion is the only one that does matter. He said that man should leave his father and mother and cleave unto his wife, not go live with his girlfriend. Sorry ladies, but if we are to be God's faithful children, we need to do what He says. He knows what is best for us and He loves us.

It's not my intention to offend anyone, but God is often very specific on issues, and if we are striving to be like His son, we need to be specific as well and speak when the Bible speaks and be silent when it is silent.

[Janet]

Totally agree with you Marilyn. I knew you'd be able to put it simply in black and white so to speak.

[Lissa]

Well, obviously if I did live with him before we got married my mom would kill me

But really, even if you don't take what the Bible has to say, I think living together should be one of those things you get to experience after getting married. I don't see what would be different other than knowing that if he wants to leave he'll have to go to court and it makes it more difficult. Living together is almost symbolic of the marriage, you both live your seperate lives in seperate places, but when you get married its no longer "my life" its "our life" so you go from "my place" to "our place." Though I wouldn't mind coming home and seeing my boyfriend there or being home when he gets off from work and having that guarentee I'll get to see him everyday, that'll have to wait for if we get married.

[DianaB]

Originally Posted by Marilyn

My opinion on this question does not matter. God gave us his Word as our guide and His opinion is the only one that does matter. He said that man should leave his father and mother and cleave unto his wife, not go live with his girlfriend. Sorry ladies, but if we are to be God's faithful children, we need to do what He says. He knows what is best for us and He loves us.

It's not my intention to offend anyone, but God is often very specific on issues, and if we are striving to be like His son, we need to be specific as well and speak when the Bible speaks and be silent when it is silent.

I agree with you 100%

[rivermom]

It clearly shows that everybody has their own thinking/opinion towards this subject.

It clearly shows that everybody has their own beliefs towards how they feel their life should be lived.

[Janet]

And isn't it wonderful that in this forum, no one is made to feel they are wrong, just because we all may believe differently? I've said it before, I'll say it again...4WT Rocks!!!!

[Tink]

Greg and I lived together 3 years before marrying. I'd had a really BAD 1st marriage, and there was no way I was subjecting myself or my daughter to that again. It took greg 3 yrs to convince me to marry him; and I seriously don't think I'd have ever built that trust if we hadn't lived together first.

Once I said yes, we were married within weeks. We've been married 21 yrs. I wouldn't say it's for everyone, but it obviously worked for us.

Hubby and I lived together for 6 months before we got engaged, were engaged for a year and have been happily married for almost 4 years. It worked out great for us!

I am currently living with my BF and its been great!! Reallly taught me how to share space and responsiblity.. I think all people should live together before getting married (JMO)

[Taurus Babe]

I think that it's fine. If that's what you want to do. I think you learn a LOT about someone living with them even if you think you know them before you move in with them. I've learned SO much living with my bf. We only were with each other 9 times before I moved in with him!! It was love at first sight It totally depends on the people involved...I think that living with together before marriage is one less 'shock' you have to deal with after you tie the knot!

[blowry]

According to todays standards, I was married young, I was 21 when I married my first husband (that was 29 yrs ago). I had my first daughter 15 months after we got married. Then 5 yrs later we had another daughter. My marriage to Bob was not a good one. He was an abusive alcoholic. A decision was made for me to not work and stay home and raise our 2 beautiful daughters. I'm not really sure if I loved him when I married him or was in love with the idea of being married and having a family. After manys unhappy years I decided to end the marriage...which, wasn't an easy thing to do, even though I was the one that wanted it. I had been married for 19 yrs when I decided it was time to leave. It was the hardest thing in my life I have ever done. I feel that if we had lived together (my parents would have disowned me if I had done this) we probably wouldn't have gotten married. I dealt with my unhappy marriage because of the children...which wasnt' fair for them either.
I have been married to a wonderful man now for 8 yrs. We dated for a yr, lived together for a year then got married. We have our ups and downs like everyone else does but, we love and cherish each other.
I feel you don't really know a person unless you live with them.