How would you react?

[Chandra Amaya]

Originally Posted by Mandy

Bless her heart! She has stood by hes side for 30 years, thats a very long time. It doesnt sound like that lady has had much of life, its about time she started living. Glad her children gave their blessings, that will make her feel better about the situation.
Tink, if i were you, i would encourage her.

I wish her a LOT of love & happiness!

I agree completely. I worked in nursing homes for almost 5 yrs. It is very sad to see what happens. MOST families drop someone off there & forget they exist. It's so nice to see someone who cares. I do think she should still check on him & I'm sure she would but she has been taking care of the body of her husband for over 30 yrs. I believe the soul can die with the mind long before the body does. She deserves happiness. She can't be miserable for the rest of her life because a tragedy took her husband's. & yes people may talk but he is basically dead. His body is still there but he is not the husband or father he was. Would anyone say something to her if she married 30 years after he had died? No...if people say something to her she just needs to remember that. No one else has walked in her shoes & most would NOT have made it over 30 years.

[Janet]

Please let us know how she is doing Tink. This thread has really touched my heart.

[Tink]

Thanks ladies! I feel she needs to have a life outside of that nursing home. She is such a good lady, and mother and friend. It's been just sad to see wht she's been through these past 30 yrs. Even her kids feel she's gone above and beyond.

Everyone so far has told her it's about time she does something for herself again.
I hope she will. I'll keep you posted if and when she does.

[Passionfruition]

Wow, I can only begin to fathom what her situation must be like for her! I think that, with the support and prayers of her family and friends, she can make the right decision - but like I said, I can only begin to imagine.

[AngieDoogles]

Originally Posted by Tink

Thanks ladies! I feel she needs to have a life outside of that nursing home. She is such a good lady, and mother and friend. It's been just sad to see wht she's been through these past 30 yrs. Even her kids feel she's gone above and beyond.

Everyone so far has told her it's about time she does something for herself again.
I hope she will. I'll keep you posted if and when she does.

That's so great that her kids are accepting of her decision (whatever it may be). I truly hope she is able to find happiness and that no one will look down on her because of it. This poor woman really deserves to have a life of her own filled with as much happiness as possible. Thanks for keeping us posted.

[Emmsmom]

Wow!
OK my honest opinion is that I don't think it would be right to divorce him. Till death do you part is how I see it. Then, I think she also deserves a life. I am really on the fence about this one. It kinda hits close to home to be honest. My grandmother took care of my papa till the day he died. He had been sick for a long time. He had a few heart attacks and even a few mini strokes. He finally had a full blown stroke that left him unable to walk or talk. She had to teach him how to walk and talk all over. She also had to take care of home just like a toddler. he was even in the nursing home for a while just so that she could get a much needed break. When he died she was lost. Years down the road she remarried and she says that she is happy but that is a whole different story.

I can see that she wants a life and I can certainly understand it. I am just reaelly on the fence about this. Either way she needs to do what is right for her. If her kids are ok with it all (that is HUGE) then I wouldn't worry about what others think. This definately gives us something to think about should something like this ever happens to us.

[Gina]

This is such a hard call, I agree with mostly everyone on here. Traci said it best, to walk in someone else's shoes is a good description. I say whatever makes her happy and we are all entitled to happiness. Tell her to follow her gut and heart.. I wish her the best. She sounds like a wonderful person and was dealt a cruel hand.

[Marilyn]

This is a really tough one. I'm glad it is not my decision. This must be a really wonderful lady who has been through more than any of us can ever begin to fathom. My heart truly goes out to her. She of all people deserves happiness. The problem is that there is only one scriptural reason that divorce may be acceptable, and it appears that this condition has not been met.

There is absolutely no way that I can say what I would do in her situation. I know what I hope I would have the strength to do, but Lord willing, this decision is never one I would have to make.

Hugs to you, Tink and to everyone involved with this lady and her family.