How would you react?

Tink · 04-04-2007, 08:07 AM

Thanks ladies! I feel she needs to have a life outside of that nursing home. She is such a good lady, and mother and friend. It's been just sad to see wht she's been through these past 30 yrs. Even her kids feel she's gone above and beyond.

Everyone so far has told her it's about time she does something for herself again.
I hope she will. I'll keep you posted if and when she does.

Passionfruition · 04-04-2007, 08:14 AM

Wow, I can only begin to fathom what her situation must be like for her! I think that, with the support and prayers of her family and friends, she can make the right decision - but like I said, I can only begin to imagine.

AngieDoogles · 04-04-2007, 06:53 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Tink

Thanks ladies! I feel she needs to have a life outside of that nursing home. She is such a good lady, and mother and friend. It's been just sad to see wht she's been through these past 30 yrs. Even her kids feel she's gone above and beyond.

Everyone so far has told her it's about time she does something for herself again.
I hope she will. I'll keep you posted if and when she does.

That's so great that her kids are accepting of her decision (whatever it may be). I truly hope she is able to find happiness and that no one will look down on her because of it. This poor woman really deserves to have a life of her own filled with as much happiness as possible. Thanks for keeping us posted.

Emmsmom · 04-12-2007, 04:25 AM

Wow!
OK my honest opinion is that I don't think it would be right to divorce him. Till death do you part is how I see it. Then, I think she also deserves a life. I am really on the fence about this one. It kinda hits close to home to be honest. My grandmother took care of my papa till the day he died. He had been sick for a long time. He had a few heart attacks and even a few mini strokes. He finally had a full blown stroke that left him unable to walk or talk. She had to teach him how to walk and talk all over. She also had to take care of home just like a toddler. he was even in the nursing home for a while just so that she could get a much needed break. When he died she was lost. Years down the road she remarried and she says that she is happy but that is a whole different story.

I can see that she wants a life and I can certainly understand it. I am just reaelly on the fence about this. Either way she needs to do what is right for her. If her kids are ok with it all (that is HUGE) then I wouldn't worry about what others think. This definately gives us something to think about should something like this ever happens to us.

Gina · 04-12-2007, 09:46 AM

This is such a hard call, I agree with mostly everyone on here. Traci said it best, to walk in someone else's shoes is a good description. I say whatever makes her happy and we are all entitled to happiness. Tell her to follow her gut and heart.. I wish her the best. She sounds like a wonderful person and was dealt a cruel hand.

Marilyn · 04-12-2007, 05:40 PM

This is a really tough one. I'm glad it is not my decision. This must be a really wonderful lady who has been through more than any of us can ever begin to fathom. My heart truly goes out to her. She of all people deserves happiness. The problem is that there is only one scriptural reason that divorce may be acceptable, and it appears that this condition has not been met.

There is absolutely no way that I can say what I would do in her situation. I know what I hope I would have the strength to do, but Lord willing, this decision is never one I would have to make.

Hugs to you, Tink and to everyone involved with this lady and her family.

Taurus Babe · 04-12-2007, 05:47 PM

That's really hard decision. Obviously, a very personal one too. [B]I[B] think that she should be with the man she has fallen in love with. It's only normal to crave love, and to crave the affection from someone else. She is an older woman, and if she wants this, I can only hope that her family and friends and community support her. Of course some in her community may not, but who are they to judge? I hope she finds love peace and happiness.

gja1000 · 04-12-2007, 07:47 PM

This happened to a very dear friend of mine. His wife had severe Alzheimer's disease. She was in a locked unit in a nursing home. He met someone and they fell in love. They eventually moved in together and had a "blessing" ceremony, but did not get married until his wife died. He still visited his wife as before, cared for her and his new love helped. It is really hard, but everyone involved was supportive of the new couple. They are now in their 90's and still going strong!

04-04-2007, 08:07 AM	#1
Tink Donating 4WT 2000 Club Member Join Date: Sep 2006 Location: Rural Wisconsin Posts: 3,707	Thanks ladies! I feel she needs to have a life outside of that nursing home. She is such a good lady, and mother and friend. It's been just sad to see wht she's been through these past 30 yrs. Even her kids feel she's gone above and beyond. Everyone so far has told her it's about time she does something for herself again. I hope she will. I'll keep you posted if and when she does. __________________ 'A simple way to take measure of a country is to look at how many want in.. And how many want out.' England 's Prime Minister Tony Blair'

04-12-2007, 04:25 AM	#4
Emmsmom Senior Member Join Date: Sep 2006 Posts: 612	Wow! OK my honest opinion is that I don't think it would be right to divorce him. Till death do you part is how I see it. Then, I think she also deserves a life. I am really on the fence about this one. It kinda hits close to home to be honest. My grandmother took care of my papa till the day he died. He had been sick for a long time. He had a few heart attacks and even a few mini strokes. He finally had a full blown stroke that left him unable to walk or talk. She had to teach him how to walk and talk all over. She also had to take care of home just like a toddler. he was even in the nursing home for a while just so that she could get a much needed break. When he died she was lost. Years down the road she remarried and she says that she is happy but that is a whole different story. I can see that she wants a life and I can certainly understand it. I am just reaelly on the fence about this. Either way she needs to do what is right for her. If her kids are ok with it all (that is HUGE) then I wouldn't worry about what others think. This definately gives us something to think about should something like this ever happens to us. __________________ MICHELLE

04-12-2007, 05:40 PM	#6
Marilyn Donating 4WT 2000 Club Member Join Date: Sep 2006 Location: South Texas Posts: 4,907	This is a really tough one. I'm glad it is not my decision. This must be a really wonderful lady who has been through more than any of us can ever begin to fathom. My heart truly goes out to her. She of all people deserves happiness. The problem is that there is only one scriptural reason that divorce may be acceptable, and it appears that this condition has not been met. There is absolutely no way that I can say what I would do in her situation. I know what I hope I would have the strength to do, but Lord willing, this decision is never one I would have to make. Hugs to you, Tink and to everyone involved with this lady and her family. __________________ Marilyn If anyone would like a free Bible Study CD or book entitled "Searching for Truth", PM me with your mailing address and I'll send you one. "And you shall know the truth and the truth shall set you free." John 8:32

04-12-2007, 05:47 PM	#7
Taurus Babe Senior Member Join Date: Sep 2006 Location: Canada Posts: 668	That's really hard decision. Obviously, a very personal one too. [B]I[B] think that she should be with the man she has fallen in love with. It's only normal to crave love, and to crave the affection from someone else. She is an older woman, and if she wants this, I can only hope that her family and friends and community support her. Of course some in her community may not, but who are they to judge? I hope she finds love peace and happiness. __________________ Taurus Babe aka Thorsmomma

04-04-2007, 08:14 AM	#2
Passionfruition Senior Member Join Date: Sep 2006 Location: Berlin, Germany Posts: 492	Wow, I can only begin to fathom what her situation must be like for her! I think that, with the support and prayers of her family and friends, she can make the right decision - but like I said, I can only begin to imagine.

04-12-2007, 09:46 AM	#5
Gina Donating 4WT 500 Club Member Join Date: Sep 2006 Posts: 6,025	This is such a hard call, I agree with mostly everyone on here. Traci said it best, to walk in someone else's shoes is a good description. I say whatever makes her happy and we are all entitled to happiness. Tell her to follow her gut and heart.. I wish her the best. She sounds like a wonderful person and was dealt a cruel hand.

04-12-2007, 07:47 PM	#8
gja1000 Donating 4WT Yakker Join Date: Sep 2006 Location: Central Texas Posts: 5,717	This happened to a very dear friend of mine. His wife had severe Alzheimer's disease. She was in a locked unit in a nursing home. He met someone and they fell in love. They eventually moved in together and had a "blessing" ceremony, but did not get married until his wife died. He still visited his wife as before, cared for her and his new love helped. It is really hard, but everyone involved was supportive of the new couple. They are now in their 90's and still going strong!

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