Sad...

katepoet · 10-19-2007, 05:31 PM

Sometimes we take separate cars so my husband can leave early!

rivermom · 10-19-2007, 05:48 PM

I've truly never understood the habitually late habits of adults. That is of course in case of an emergency, etc.

It was ingrained in my head as a young teen that times were set for a reason. If i didn't meet the time required I paid the crime. (always two weeks of restriction)

Trust me, I hated restriction...LOL But now as an adult. I am NEVER late anywhere I go. And luckily my husband understands too the importance of time.

I feel it is nothing but rude and inconsiderate for others to have to wait on those who are late. It's disrecspectful that those who arrive late don't have respect for those whom are waiting. It says to the person waiting "you don't matter". Urghghghh this one always get's me angry, LOL

I wish I had magic answers for you Angie and do hope that the two of you come up with some plans that might resolve this problem. If you have the magic button, and pushed it transforms your husband to do what you really need him to do...Can I borrow it please?

AngieDoogles · 10-19-2007, 07:04 PM

Thanks for all of the great advice ladies. It seems like a few of you are just like me when it comes to not wanting to be late. I think Sheryl put it best when she said that's it's about respect for other people. That's really the key point, the main reason I hate being late for anything.

Bren is working on being on time more often because he knows how important it is to me, but I'm just so impatient! I want him to be on time, every time, starting now. lol. I know it's a process and I'm so glad he's working on it. I just need to remember to give him room to make mistakes...

judy · 10-21-2007, 10:52 AM

Angie,

You can want him to do it because he loves you enough all you want. Not that you're wrong, but you may have to help him out to get him there.

We all know Brendon loves you. It's time for a sit down and a long talk on why he's late, and how can you help him. I agree with Kate on this one. Things like habitual lateness are usually more complicated than meets the eye.

AngieDoogles · 10-21-2007, 06:47 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by judy

Angie,

You can want him to do it because he loves you enough all you want. Not that you're wrong, but you may have to help him out to get him there.

We all know Brendon loves you. It's time for a sit down and a long talk on why he's late, and how can you help him. I agree with Kate on this one. Things like habitual lateness are usually more complicated than meets the eye.

We've talked about it SO many times. It has nothing to do with a need to be independent or anything else like that. It's always just that he "forgets" or doesn't have everything together or needs to brush his teeth...or something. Being on time just isn't a high priority for him like it is for me. But you know, I really have a lot of other things to be thankful for so I should just learn to let it go when he's late.

judy · 10-22-2007, 08:10 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by AngieDoogles

We've talked about it SO many times. It has nothing to do with a need to be independent or anything else like that. It's always just that he "forgets" or doesn't have everything together or needs to brush his teeth...or something. Being on time just isn't a high priority for him like it is for me. But you know, I really have a lot of other things to be thankful for so I should just learn to let it go when he's late.

If you can - it be too high a priority for you to just let it go, but if not, he is a
wonderful young man, and a great husband.

You can also spend the entire rest of your married life fighting about it. It might really be too important for you to let go. Anyway, make-up sex is fun.

Tink · 10-22-2007, 08:51 AM

My dh too is one who is habitually late. HOWEVER he drives semi and is almost never late with a delivery....

In our case, I feel it's passive aggression. He resents being expected to go ANYWHERE on his rare days off and this is his way of making sure people know it. When he gets home the last thing he wants to do is to go anywhere else! Aftr 25 yrs together I've learned to just go by myself ON TIME if it's tht important, or not get upset with him if he makes us late. Sometimes you just have to pick your battles, and 25 yrs is too long to keep fighting over anything that's not life threatening.

AngieDoogles · 10-22-2007, 09:49 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by judy

If you can - it be too high a priority for you to just let it go, but if not, he is a
wonderful young man, and a great husband.

You can also spend the entire rest of your married life fighting about it. It might really be too important for you to let go. Anyway, make-up sex is fun.

LOL Judy! I would agree with that, but my mom is on this forum too, and you know what that means? I don't have sex! I'm her sweet and innocent little girl. Right?

10-19-2007, 05:48 PM	#2
rivermom Donating 4WT 500 Club Member Join Date: Sep 2006 Location: Tontitown, Arkansas Posts: 2,475	I've truly never understood the habitually late habits of adults. That is of course in case of an emergency, etc. It was ingrained in my head as a young teen that times were set for a reason. If i didn't meet the time required I paid the crime. (always two weeks of restriction) Trust me, I hated restriction...LOL But now as an adult. I am NEVER late anywhere I go. And luckily my husband understands too the importance of time. I feel it is nothing but rude and inconsiderate for others to have to wait on those who are late. It's disrecspectful that those who arrive late don't have respect for those whom are waiting. It says to the person waiting "you don't matter". Urghghghh this one always get's me angry, LOL I wish I had magic answers for you Angie and do hope that the two of you come up with some plans that might resolve this problem. If you have the magic button, and pushed it transforms your husband to do what you really need him to do...Can I borrow it please? __________________ ~_/> , /\/\ ,,, Sheryl When I grow up I want to be a horse whisperer!

10-19-2007, 07:04 PM	#3
AngieDoogles Donating 4WT 4000 Club Member Join Date: Feb 2007 Posts: 6,509	Thanks for all of the great advice ladies. It seems like a few of you are just like me when it comes to not wanting to be late. I think Sheryl put it best when she said that's it's about respect for other people. That's really the key point, the main reason I hate being late for anything. Bren is working on being on time more often because he knows how important it is to me, but I'm just so impatient! I want him to be on time, every time, starting now. lol. I know it's a process and I'm so glad he's working on it. I just need to remember to give him room to make mistakes... __________________ "Twenty years from now you will be more disappointed by the things that you didn't do than by the ones you did do. So throw off the bowlines. Sail away from the safe harbor. Catch the trade winds in your sails. Explore. Dream. Discover." ~MT

10-21-2007, 10:52 AM	#4
judy Donating 4WT Yakker Join Date: Jan 2007 Location: Denver, NY Posts: 8,097	Angie, You can want him to do it because he loves you enough all you want. Not that you're wrong, but you may have to help him out to get him there. We all know Brendon loves you. It's time for a sit down and a long talk on why he's late, and how can you help him. I agree with Kate on this one. Things like habitual lateness are usually more complicated than meets the eye. __________________ *Judy*

10-22-2007, 08:51 AM	#7
Tink Donating 4WT 2000 Club Member Join Date: Sep 2006 Location: Rural Wisconsin Posts: 3,707	My dh too is one who is habitually late. HOWEVER he drives semi and is almost never late with a delivery.... In our case, I feel it's passive aggression. He resents being expected to go ANYWHERE on his rare days off and this is his way of making sure people know it. When he gets home the last thing he wants to do is to go anywhere else! Aftr 25 yrs together I've learned to just go by myself ON TIME if it's tht important, or not get upset with him if he makes us late. Sometimes you just have to pick your battles, and 25 yrs is too long to keep fighting over anything that's not life threatening. __________________ 'A simple way to take measure of a country is to look at how many want in.. And how many want out.' England 's Prime Minister Tony Blair'

10-19-2007, 05:31 PM	#1
katepoet Senior Member Join Date: Sep 2007 Posts: 992	Sometimes we take separate cars so my husband can leave early!

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