Adhd

[Necee419]

My stepson, who is 15, was diagnosed with ADD. He was put on Ritalin and he didn't like the "dopey" feeling he got from it. He has since been off medication. He lives in Florida with his mom but spends a month in the summer with my husband and I. One of the things that strikes me about him is that he cannot concentrate in school or anything academic. But put a playstation 2 game or an action movie in front of him and the world can collapse around him and it would not break his concentration. So how is this ADD? Or is it selective ADD? I don't know how I feel about all of this medication for such young children. I know it truly helps some kids do better in school and that some children ABSOLUTELY need meds but I worry that doctors are too quick with prescribing medication for children. In the case of my stepson, I don't think he lacks attention skills, it is more like lack of interest and laziness. I am sure there are many others like him out there that are being pumped full of medication unneccesarily. Again, I am not referring to anyone who truly needs them.

[Janet]

Originally Posted by Necee419

My stepson, who is 15, was diagnosed with ADD. He was put on Ritalin and he didn't like the "dopey" feeling he got from it. He has since been off medication. He lives in Florida with his mom but spends a month in the summer with my husband and I. One of the things that strikes me about him is that he cannot concentrate in school or anything academic. But put a playstation 2 game or an action movie in front of him and the world can collapse around him and it would not break his concentration. So how is this ADD? Or is it selective ADD? I don't know how I feel about all of this medication for such young children. I know it truly helps some kids do better in school and that some children ABSOLUTELY need meds but I worry that doctors are too quick with prescribing medication for children. In the case of my stepson, I don't think he lacks attention skills, it is more like lack of interest and laziness. I am sure there are many others like him out there that are being pumped full of medication unneccesarily. Again, I am not referring to anyone who truly needs them.

Don't be too quick to judge your step-son as being lazy and lack of interest. The reason they can do so well with video games is because there is soooo much happening in them all at the same time. At least that's how the Drs. explained it to us. It's when they are in the classroom, where, really not too much is happening. I mean they are just listening to the teacher, or doing their school work. Basically, just one thing at a time and that is why it is hard to stay focused.

A lot of ADD and ADHD kids do great in sports because there are so many things to watch for and do at the same time. Hope this helps explain it.

[Necee419]

That makes sense. He is good in anything that involves lots of brain stimulation. Like if you buy him those complicated Legos sets (like Star Wars, etc.), he'll spend hours constructing the images on the box. Hubby made him and his sister get books from the library to read over the summer and it was torture for him. He hates to read. His mom took him off the medication because he complained that he didn't like the way he felt on them. He just started the new school year in Florida and already my husband has gotten a few calls from his mom saying he isn't doing well and has gotten in trouble a few times already. My husband is resolved the he is never going to be an "einstein." I feel so bad for him.

[Janet]

Have them talk to his Drs. again. Maybe they can ask him about Concerta. It's a one a day, time released pill and it makes my son stay focused. We don't notice any change in his behavior, moods, or anything like that. It just helps him stay on task and focused. Do give up on him yet. They know how they are feeling and it wears on them too, not to be able to concentrate.

[Necee419]

I wish I could do more for him but being the "stepmom" there is only so much I can say. I express my opinions to my husband but he lets the mom make most of those decisions since she is the one taking care of him. She is another story, the poor woman is manic depressive and is on meds too. Sometimes she is in bed all day and the kids have to fend for themselves. My stepdaughter is 13 and she has to remind her mom to take her medication sometimes. It is as if they are raising themselves. They don't come to live with us because it would devastate their mom. My stepson has many anger issues as well as the ADD so together it is a recipe for disaster.

[Janet]

Originally Posted by Necee419

I wish I could do more for him but being the "stepmom" there is only so much I can say. I express my opinions to my husband but he lets the mom make most of those decisions since she is the one taking care of him. She is another story, the poor woman is manic depressive and is on meds too. Sometimes she is in bed all day and the kids have to fend for themselves. My stepdaughter is 13 and she has to remind her mom to take her medication sometimes. It is as if they are raising themselves. They don't come to live with us because it would devastate their mom. My stepson has many anger issues as well as the ADD so together it is a recipe for disaster.

Who could blame him for being angry...his parents are divorced, his father is so far away, his mom is manic depressive, he and his sister have to "take care" of his mother, his grades are failing, (other students probably know this and can be cruel), plus all the feelings he is having because of his ADD. His father needs to step in and help his children. If the mother can't handle it, then she needs to get some help. He needs to take care of his children, above all else. It doesn't have to be permanent..just until things straighten out.

[Necee419]

He always talks to their mom and tells her if she needs time to take care of herself, to send them to us. She doesn't want to because she says they are all she has. She has a husband but they have their own problems in that relationship. My husband has been divorced from her for 10 years so the kids are pretty used to it and I don't think that is an issue. She uses my husband as a threat to the kids "better shape up or I'm sending you to your father". My husband is very stern with them and they are afraid of him. When they are with us they are straight and well behaved. Once they go home, mom lets them go out with their friends and hang out and get away with lots of things. Then when they act up, she calls my husband.