bad weekend

[pope1982]

His ego is bruised, he will get over it. And if he doesn't, and can't realize he needs to make you feel special by being spontaneous and romantic, he's not ready for this serious a relationship anyhow. He needs to work on getting you relaxed first! He is approaching this bass ackwards.

It does sound like your hormones spiraling, and I don't know your past but if there is a under lying issue with you and intimacy, you need to talk to some one. These things don't go away on their own. Coming from some one with experience!

Neither one of you are horrible people, you are young and the first couple years trying to figure out how you mesh together is always the toughest. You need to come together and get through this as a team.
I am getting married next March and trust me when I say we have been through some pretty trying times. You never know, just hang in there and don't give up or change yourself (unless you feel yourself you need to grow, which in all truthfulness couldn't hurt any of us )

Live life now, go with your gut.
We are just hear to listen, be here for you, and maybe share an experience or two since most of us have been where you are. Who cares what any of us have to say about your relationship. That is between you two, don't let any one make you question yourself or what you've got.
Him jumping to conclusions does not automatically make HIM a cheater either. It makes him imperfect (like the rest of us) and insecure. We're all guilty of letting the little green monster of jealousy take the wheel from time to time!

I don't want you to feel like I am sticking up for him, I am just trying to think about this from both sides because I have two brothers lol
The differences between men and women are so fascinating and making a relationship work between ANY two people is a lot of hard work.

Cheer up! It is not the end of the world, you are a beautiful caring woman and I hate to read when you are upset.

I will give you a little tip though, next time he calls don't let him see that you are visibly upset. That is what he wants right now, because he is hurting. Just tell him you're a little busy right now and to give you a call back when he feels like rejoining you as an adult partner to work this out. Ask him to read up on some of the side effects of your pill, and even some things on depression.
Sex comes and goes, changes like the weather in a long term relationship. Timing can get all screwed up... one is ready to go and the other is so far from "there".
But it is worth it in those moments when you come together and it all works out

That is why the key is to find a best friend for those quiet, event less moments called "life"

[Lindsey]

Thank you

[Gina]

Lindsey , you have gotten good advice from everyone. All I am going to say and I am a mother and going to sound like one . You have been down this road numerous times with Kyle. Kyle is not going to change. If this is what you want out of life , your a big girl. I always say don't settle at your age. But I am not the one in your shoes so it easier for me to speak. But I was once your age to. Wisdom comes with maturity. One day you will wake up and say I don't need this negativity in my life.

Your a beautiful and smart girl, please don't let any guy wrap you around his finger. I think you need to speak to someone whether it be your mom, a favorite woman relative, an older woman or someone from your church. Depression is tough most have suffered at one time or another . Please no one is worth taking your life . God has given you a beautiful gift, the gift of life.

As far as the sex if you don't feel like having it. Never let a man pressure you or bully you.. You think your sex drive is low now, wait till you get older, you will experence sex drives change, sometimes better , sometimes worse..


Be yourself and never, ever feel insecure around Kyle or any of his friends. They are not better than you. Remember that !

[Janet]

Originally Posted by Gina

Lindsey , you have gotten good advice from everyone. All I am going to say and I am a mother and going to sound like one . You have been down this road numerous times with Kyle. Kyle is not going to change. If this is what you want out of life , your a big girl. I always say don't settle at your age. But I am not the one in your shoes so it easier for me to speak. But I was once your age to. Wisdom comes with maturity. One day you will wake up and say I don't need this negativity in my life.

Your a beautiful and smart girl, please don't let any guy wrap you around his finger. I think you need to speak to someone whether it be your mom, a favorite woman relative, an older woman or someone from your church. Depression is tough most have suffered at one time or another . Please no one is worth taking your life . God has given you a beautiful gift, the gift of life.

As far as the sex if you don't feel like having it. Never let a man pressure you or bully you.. You think your sex drive is low now, wait till you get older, you will experence sex drives change, sometimes better , sometimes worse..


Be yourself and never, ever feel insecure around Kyle or any of his friends. They are not better than you. Remember that !

[Marilyn]

Lindsey, I've been unsure how to address this issue, but feel compelled to say something here. You are not Kyle's wife, so you have no obligation to have sex with him anyway. In fact, it's rather absurd that he should even expect it from you. We complicate situations when we become intimate when we should not. Your relationship would be much different if you had waited until you were married. Life is not like in the movies and TV, it's much much more complex and we need to keep some things special.

[Taurus Babe]

Oh guys can be so complicating! Lindsay, I hope things get better. I'm not one to whip out a quote, but I'd like to share this with you. I am not judging you or your relationship, I just think these are great quotes that apply to everyone.

"If someone is not treating you with love and respect, it is a gift if they walk away from you. If that person doesn't walk away, you will surely endure many years of suffering with him or her."

"You will find that you don't need to trust others as much as you need to trust yourself to make the right choices."

**From the book: "A Practical Guide to Personal Freedom: The Four Agreements" By: Don Miguel Ruiz**

Ps, Make sure to let me know if you make any trips to Vancouver!

[Lindsey]

Originally Posted by Taurus Babe

Oh guys can be so complicating! Lindsay, I hope things get better. I'm not one to whip out a quote, but I'd like to share this with you. I am not judging you or your relationship, I just think these are great quotes that apply to everyone.

"If someone is not treating you with love and respect, it is a gift if they walk away from you. If that person doesn't walk away, you will surely endure many years of suffering with him or her."

"You will find that you don't need to trust others as much as you need to trust yourself to make the right choices."

**From the book: "A Practical Guide to Personal Freedom: The Four Agreements" By: Don Miguel Ruiz**

Ps, Make sure to let me know if you make any trips to Vancouver!

Thanks. I'm totally being tough and standing up to him right now. I'm actually pretty proud of myself!
And I would absolutely LOVE to go to Vancouver! It's my number 2 Canadian place I want to visit, after Montreal! But it doesn't look like it'll be happening this year since I'm already taking 2 holidays. I'd say the same to you, to let me know if you make any trips to Saskatoon, although there's absolutely nothing here that's better than Vancouver lol. We're the "Paris of the Prairies" but that's not saying much

[Lindsey]

Originally Posted by Marilyn

Lindsey, I've been unsure how to address this issue, but feel compelled to say something here. You are not Kyle's wife, so you have no obligation to have sex with him anyway. In fact, it's rather absurd that he should even expect it from you. We complicate situations when we become intimate when we should not. Your relationship would be much different if you had waited until you were married. Life is not like in the movies and TV, it's much much more complex and we need to keep some things special.

I know that some people may judge me for my life choices, but I have no regrets. I'm not particularly religious so I know some people who are don't agree with my choice to have sex before marriage. To be honest, the first guy I had sex with I wanted to marry. We waited 2 years before we did it and a year later we broke up, and I'm SO GLAD we did! At the time it hurt but I think it made me strong, and I realized that what was keeping us together wasn't that we were in love or that we even liked each other that much anymore, it was just that I had thought I could only have sex with one person in my whole life. I'm not promiscuous by any means, but when I'm in a monogomous relationship with someone I really care about I don't feel badly at all for doing what I do.
I know there's a large generation gap and a large religious and cultural gap between me and a lot of the women here, and I totally respect where all of you are coming from, so don't get the wrong idea