Repairing a Friendship

[Willow]

Thanks ladies. I just find it hard to cut people out of my life. She has said in a letter that she didn't want anymore contact with me and I have been honoring that but I have since found out that the way things ended have bothered her too. I guess I have just been waiting to see if she would try to contact me.

[magnolia]

Originally Posted by Willow

Thanks ladies. I just find it hard to cut people out of my life. She has said in a letter that she didn't want anymore contact with me and I have been honoring that but I have since found out that the way things ended have bothered her too. I guess I have just been waiting to see if she would try to contact me.

And maybe she's sitting there waiting for you to contact her. If you feel in your heart it's the right thing to do, then give her a call. As I said earlier, if nothing more comes of it, then you can feel good about your attempt to repair the friendship. The friend I mentioned above - she and I are slowly working our way back to being friends. But it's been too many years and too many changes in our lives so it's a struggle. We may go days or weeks without calling or emailing one another but compared to the past where we went years without speaking, this is progress for us. Whatever decision you make, know that you are in my thoughts and prayers

[Necee419]

Looking from the outside in, it looks like you guys had a "toxic" relationship. She basically leeched on you and you gave and gave and never got anything in return. There is a saying in Spanish that says that "habit is more powerful than love." This refers to people who stay together more because they are used to having each other around and not so much because they love one another. I think you miss her because she was always a part of your life, but not really because she was a positive one. Your husband is the best judge in this situation because he loves you and knows what your friendship with this women does to you emotionally. If he objects so strongly, I am sure it is for a good reason. While only you know what is the right decision for you, I personally believe you should leave well enough alone. If you feel that you need to clear the air with her, mostly to clear your conscience, then do so, but you should not attempt to rekindle the friendship. In the end, you may cause problems in your marriage, and add aggravation to your life. Is her friendship really worth all of that?